Alarm clocks.

I'm back home now and basking in the freezing glare of the Rising sun. It's frigid here and the weatherman is forecasting snow for tomorrow. After spending the last seven days cruising one of the worlds most popular playgrounds, I am finding it difficult to return to the daily grind that consumes all my time and barely covers the cost of living.

From start to finish the entire vacation was one grand adventure. The kind of thing you'd expect to see on the front end of a double feature: beautiful backgrounds, lots of T&A, strained dialogue and and a torpid array of tasteless humour and sophomoric pranks.

The start of the vacation was one of total panic and confusion. This might have lent itself to the total relaxation that followed upon arrival in Hawaii, but it certainly contributed to a rise in bl
ood pressure and the prominent and constant display of a throbbing vein in my forehead.

The first leg of the journey started in Hanamaki airport, a half assed little strip that services the rice farmers and cattle ranchers in the area, delivering them to any one of about four cities in Japan. This shitburg of an airport was important 'cause it was our connection to the international airport in Nagoya where we would meet up with Scary Monster and his vixen of the moment and then be delivered to the palm tree lined streets of Waikiki.

When you start upon a journey there are many things that keep you on the razor's edge. Things that you check over and and over and over again, ad nauseum, until you are positive that the passports are safely tucked away in their pre-determined pockets of your luggage and your plane tickets are settled right next to them in an comfortable comfit of incestuous alignment.

The night before we left for the was filled with anticipation and excitement. I felt like I had just had a double, double cappuccino with five spoons of sugar and a hefty dollop of whipped cream on top. Wired is an understatement...
With all the preparation of our impending departure, we forgot to do one thing, properly set the alarm clocks! We should have woken up at 6:30. We woke up at five to eight. Imagine the confusion that occured when your flight is 90 minutes from take off and it takes you more than an hour to get to the airport....

To be continued