August 19, 2008

In from the cold

Well, I lost my notes for this post so everything is officially pffhfft! Fair enough to say I didn't have to work for a week, so life couldn't have been so bad...

It isn't.

Not really, but upon my return to my very humble abode and the catching up with the world and the goings on I started to think about just how the events of the week and all of it's unexpected occurrences were reflected in my life.
Bernie Mac and Isaac Hayes have died and that just pisses me off and saddens me.
The Russians have made their play against Saakasvili and the Olympics are once again involved in U.S. - Soviet relations and I find that somewhat nostalgic.
Mark Spitz is no longer The Man.
I am overjoyed with the new king and saddened by the passing of the old. I feel like there is a changing of the guard and I am part of what is being left behind.

In a perfect world there is no need to either have nor feel compelled to live up to the expectations of others. This is not a perfect world and I like it that way. Bumps and bruises keep life interesting. Now, bumps take their toll and it gets a little harder to bounce back each time.

I really loath it whenever I am feeling dissatisfied with my life someone describes it as my mid-life crisis. Knowing my character as well as I do, I am pretty certain that I was ticked off about stuff while in the womb; so what was that? Pre-life crisis?

Gratuitous sexy picture of Japanese goddess for Mr.Grant

I take things personally. Everything I read, see, talk about and experience thrummms and jives and keeps me either waggin' my tail or gnashin' my teeth and pissing on hubcaps.

I started out the week with a smile and ended it with a snarl.
I can be sarcastic (understatement!) and that makes things tough on a relationship. Last night a whole lot of rancor and pent up emotions surfaced and a litany of complaints, along with quite a few sparks, laser beams and lightning flashes passed between the wife and I.

It seems that neither of us has lived up to the image that we keep of ourselves in our minds. I guess that's just being human and many of us are guilty of that. What do you do when things aren't the way you want them to be? What do you do when everything seems to be unravelling and you can't keep it together. How do you let go and enjoy the ride if you think the cart is going to fly off the track?

I am balancing on the edge and I don't know which side I will fall on.

The future is vast.

No matter where I end up the sun will shine.

The next post will be bright and filled with leprechauns, promise!


lime said...

leprechauns are overrated but a wry smile would be groovy.

i'll give the hughes' your regards.

Anonymous said...

leprechauns frighten me, that goddess is truly divine :-)

leelee said...

Love your candor as always...


Grant said...

Thanks for the hottie. Do you find sarcasm difficult to deploy in Japan? I've learned to watch it around certain J-people here.

Enemy of the Republic said...

I know you made Grant happy, and my happiness comes from contemplating his. I just found out about Isaac Hayes last night. Then with Georgia and Russia, I wonder if history is repeating itself while wiping itself out at the same time.

Buck up, my buddie.

Mona said...

leprechauns ? now what are those?

Poor Misplaced... I think a few lessons in EQ would do you good

You are too young for a mid life crisis

Get some prozac or rinaltin inside you

When I fight with hubby, my anger starts dissipating on its own, because immediately I become watchful I start sounding ridiculous to myself. & then I tell myself " how stupid is that! what a waste of energy & time!"

NYD I write quite a literary post this time which I thought you might like to read, since you are from the subject.

if you want to read the book, just drop me a mail & I will send you a copy

Megan said...

Sometimes when I am bemoaning my single state, I stop and remind myself that at least I only ever argue with me, and that means I always win.

But the victory is a hollow one...

The Troll said...

Hey, did you spell "certainly" incorrectly on the "Leave your comment" section on purpose?

If so, it was shear genuis.

Anonymous said... intense.

Hope things are getting better.


Allan said...

I also simultaneously love, anticipate and fear the future.'s hoping for some better days.

Ming the Merciless said...

Hang in there, bro. We all go through periods of dissatisfaction, uncertainty and feeling lost.

I have been feeling the same way for the last couple of years. I want excitement and ambiguity but I always choose the mundane and security over anything else.

What am I afraid of?