September 26, 2008

No wrest for the wheary

While others look toward the weekend with drooling, expectant grins and throbbing libidos. The leader of the non-conformists collective was preparing his followers for a new assault on his thoroughly entrenched adversary; boredom.

Sitting back with his feet propped up on his desk, toothpick gently working out a piece of popcorn from between his molars...

It's perfectly fine with me if you don't exactly understand what's goin on, nobody else does either.
I am once again on my way out of town for the weekend. This time it is to attend a wedding.
My wife's cousin is gettin hitched and the whole family is getting together to celebrate.

I have experienced weddings, both my own and those of friends, on two different continents now and although the ceremonies differ the basic ideas are the same.
Toast the bride and groom as many times as you can. This gives you the licence to imbibe beyond the norm. Find out if how many sisters the bride has and get cosy with the musicians.

There was a time when the word wedding made me shiver and squirm just like when someone drew their fingernails across the black board in high school. Nowadaaays I have changed my opinion. I feel more like the recipient of an intensive tax audit.

I have a lot in common with weddings- there is a tendency to go on longer than most people want you to and there is a feeling that you ought to care about something jussst a little more than you usually do.

Anyway, I 'm off, (my rocker) and will return with a bunch of photos and hopefully a story or two that won't make you want to puke.




19 comments:

Mona said...

Oh! is that what I was doing? preparing for an assault on boredom? Thanks for informing me about my own deeds!

What you TOAST the bride & the groom??? You mean you 'burn' them right at the start???

EEEEEESSSSSHHHH!!!!!!

lime said...

uuuumm....have fun?

puerileuwaite said...

You haven't lived until you've lived through a shotgun wedding, my friend.

jGrrl said...

I think I'm afraid of both weddings and weekends...

Kurt said...

Weddings for me mark the moment when I'll no longer be hearing from a friend anymore.

Megan said...

Hm, second post about weddings I've seen today!

I enjoy going to weddings. I don't think I'll ever have one of my own, but other people's are sure fun.

Serena said...

Hopefully, you had fun. I'll invite you to my next wedding. That one will be fun.:)

Anonymous said...

Do you have the urge to run to the bride/groom and say...
"Wait!!!"
or
"Can we have a long talk??? Please?"
or
"Now, how old are you?"

The last wedding I went to I laughed at everything...and didn't get nearly drunk enough to enjoy it.
However, the night was not a total loss when all was said and done.
Not that it was the smartest thing I've ever done...
No more weddings...
really-
until my kids are ready-
and I am pretty sure I won't be ready then either.

Ughh- does anyone realize how very long term these commitments are? Even when they are broken? They last for longer than we can imagine.

moi said...

Weddings are a great excuse for me to wear a new pair of heels. I know you can't relate to that, but you know how I am.

Have fun. Eat, drink. Be. Merry.

ThursdayNext said...

Oh my goodness everyone here is so jaded about weddings! I long for that day with my Prince...its going to be small and private, not a circus at all and it will be about US. I admit that I loathe cookie cutter weddings, but a wedding in general is something I just love...

The Mighty Beluga said...

never been to a wedding, but the movie wedding crashers glorified them for me plenty

Enemy of the Republic said...

Lol at Pug.

That wedding analogy is brilliant. You are a great writer; why do you think anyone wants to puke here?

I think weekends are overrated; I usually have to work.

Pink said...

Good. I don't fancy puking.

:)

xx
pinks

rubenh (thesocialreformer.com) said...

hopefully it went well

The Grunt said...

I haven't had to go to a wedding in three years. It's been the best three years of my life.

Mona said...

Still wresting? :D

VE said...

I never get invited to weddings. People are afraid...

Anonymous said...

It's nice to get updates of things that are happening so far away. My best to the family and their nuptials. A long and fruitful life, with many children and the blessing of happiness. May time bring the knowledge of wisdom when things don't always go well and a smile on your faces each day you wake knowing the other is there for you.
Please forward our Love from the other side of the globe.
JBG

Grant said...

The financial crisis is the big news, but in the Southeast we're being affected more by the gasoline shortage. All stations in my neighborhood are dry and people are camping in their cars and lining up before dawn to intercept the rare shipment we get. I had to cancel my plans to attend JapanFest this year (and thus any chance for a random bunny encounter) this weekend. From what I heard, attendance was down due to fears of spending money and gas. Fortunately, you live in a civilized country and don't have to deal with such things.